Sorrows Flight

I am naked and skin

Dissolving into the cracks

That lead me back

To a tiny casket

A love turned black

I begin to lose sleep

Just like back then

An ever haunting fear

It will happen

Again

Then…I breathe

I have no control

Pretending I do

Has worn me thin

I look at my youngest

Joyful to the fullest

Her magical essence

Shifts my perspective

She transforms

The pain in our faces

For I still have

Three precious angels

Though they may be

Flying

In different spaces

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Red Palms 





The room fills

So dark and heavy
The screams lurk
Absorbed and steady
The second I turn away
You lunge and hit me 
Your hands on my bare back
Slapping so violently
Like everything you have buried
Erupts 
And I’m the bullseye for your mental 
Vomit 
I thought we were past this?
You know what,  I’m so damn sick 
Of looking over my shoulder 
It’s a guess of what to expect 
An apologetic hug or
The rage of your fists. 



High on Anxiety

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My hearts beating so fast

And heavy
Feels like a stone
Thump thump thumping
A pattern of manic beats
Paranoid and ready
Expecting the unexpected
As it happened before
Shock and horror
Barging through the front door
Uninvited
Now those experiences lurk inside me
I evaluate and weigh the probability
Of the monsters life expectancy
It’s like a thrill ride
Without the gravity
A bad dream
When you wake up falling
It’s my memories calling
My intuition warning
Sometimes the mutt hides in the night
And rises with the morning
Terror dripping and weaving
Dissecting every inch of my strung up feelings
My pulse is revved up
And it’s impossible to sleep
Welcome to the night of an insomniac
High on anxiety beats