Skeletons 

  

Too angry to dress
The platforms I avoid to address
But this rage
shakes my skeleton
Turning me to a different page
Don’t look at me!
Don’t even turn to ask me
I won’t pause for the door keys
My fists pound down the wood
My fists bleed with fury
Like the boundary got crossed
Like the lines that got lost
The flood is rising
Too high for us to cross
Too deep for us to handle
I saw myself
Alone at the bus stop
Where suburbia melts into the ghetto
And I can’t stay cuz I belong there
I ran faster than the wolves there
Some kind of homegrown shelter
I recognize the pain of others
Without words or a disguise
It hardens all over our faces
And we don’t hide it
Our skin is thick with an abrasive truth
Cracking with the melancholy of accomplishment
Adrenaline has me shook again
Left to make sense of a windstorm
Without the comfort of the wind
Stand up and dig in
The rusted smell of a broken swing 
The sting of smiles where we played
Muddy feet and wrung out blankets
Keep me warm again
Distant lies and cold hands
Got me runnin again
Towards a forgotten empowerment 
Bones of a new 

Skeleton


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Skyscrapers in the wind 

  

We are skyscrapers in the wind

Forged In the center of a hurricane
Collided as one we bend  
Tell me you love me
Let me feel your hand 
Let our flesh melt into eachother 
As the harpist leads the band
Calmly sinking below sea level
Their music resonates in crystalline bubbles 
We rise faster and faster 
As triumph outruns disaster 
Tell me you love me 
Melt your words into my skin
I can no longer hear the music 
Yet the harp is in my hands 

  

Ink it out! 

  

Art speaks in limitless ways 

The way dancers flock to an open space 
The way brushstrokes externalize a buried rage 
The way a chef sprinkles rosemary and sage 
The way a writer grips to the connection of a page 
Or a stick
Grounded dirt or sand
I once wrote with my fingernail on the shakiness of my panicked palm
Bathroom stalls and park benches 
Sometimes lipstick and a mirror appear heaven gifted 
When my daughter died I scribbled inside my head 
The litter of leftover thoughts
Still murmur like a distant rattling of mamas mixing pots 
Beyond a perfect line, circle or square 
Is my stream of penmanship 
Combating the woo of normalness
I do my best work under the duress of craziness
I wrote on a notepad in a bathtub in a hotel room
They said my brother was dying 
And I didn’t know what the fuck else to do
Punch a nurse or doctor?
The postman of premortem…
My tips ink it out harder 
Sometimes I dance and scream 
Shredding down the walls of my brain
Griefs found me like a ravaging bloodhound
Inside, all is not safe and sound 
But I smile and wave and nod
I am a mother and a lover 
I am a human spirit 
I share grief with the infinity of others
“Let’s talk and sit around in a circle”
but sometimes I spin out!
My Shape… is nameless
A pale face bound by a galaxy of freckles 
The overlapping and intersecting lines
The willpower of a lioness
There are no instructions for madness!
So I use the benefit of pen and paper
To be understood by myself 
and none other.



 

Absence 

I listen to the silence
Where laughter used to be
As the record spins
Absent bodies move further from me
Elation only ever comes in moments
Then it runs away 
I can hear the sobbing
Where the church bells use to sing
And I can hear the bullets rip out
As they hit me one by one 
Death trails joy 
No longer a fair trade 
A treasure worn
Then locked and submerged to her grave
My heart sags on a torn sleeve
The ripples so heavy on the surface
Camouflage the rocks sleeping underneath us 
If I could hop on the dragons back
I’d fly away
But the camels thirsting in the desert
And I think he’s lost his way 

Written: 5~23~2013

Still here 

  

I’m alone on all sides

The center of a dissenagrating point
The compass pointed home
So on shaky knees you rose 
I remain behind
Asking why
The question becomes a scream in no time 
I want your life
I want your life 
At the center of a dissenagrating point
I’ve already flatlined 
I have no life
I have no life 
A body without a fire
The world without a brother 
Alone on all sides
A child taken without her mother 
The compass points home 
An infected earth where the demons roam
You’re high above with the angels
While I’m still here, staring at the devil.  


Written: 8~11~14





Alien 

I’m contemplating

Looking into your eyes

While I tell you your answers
While I coverup my secrets 
While I wash my face again 
And coverup my sins 
My youth burning brakes against
The daily process of growing age
I’m rarely what you see 
Or what you think
The heat that succumbs you 
Thinking it will never leave
Is condensed into one bead 
Of sweat against your t-shirt 
In the morning it has left you 
And when you ask you wait 
For me to tell you
How it is I never cry 

  






Undercover 



You squirm undercover 

Promising both sides it’s for the grander picture 

But what say you as a justification 

For all the hearts you break along the way

Cruelest jest – you prey on spirits like a game 

And the greater scheme?

Cannot be completed through demise and destruction 

On this side we build with wholeness and love 

So you should just go

Your tricks are exposed

Your covers been blown 

Your bidding for a brighter future will lose its tact and pull

As karma spreads like wildfire and you reap what you’ve sewn 



The Miss



This week arrives 

Like heat on ice 
The impact of my heart disintegrating 
It weakens and remains solemn
I miss you sweetie
And the miss within is raging 
Its teeth are cutting 
Its fangs are slashing 
Its eyes are stinging 
Its throat is a compilation of rocks
Stuck on memories
To force a stop 
Don’t tell me to capture the moments 
The miss is still angry
Remembering craddling her lifeless daughter
Is that what you want me to see?
Years later 
The miss is sicker than ever 
Oh no!
The aftershock of disaster
Rolling through my busted structure 
Why why why…
It’s maddening, I’ll never know 
I just float in this miss
Covering and curling me in
Losing my daughter
Losing my skin 



Seasons 



Long has been the day

When summer soothed the breast of autumn 
Will you
Bring our plants back to life again?
I’m dazed and flushed
Off everything that could have been
Like the tin man 
Searching for what I never knew I had 
I see you in every shard of glass
Crystals splitting colors within the dark 
As leftover memories provoke my heart