lies

Burned

by Souldiergirl



And in a snap 

Trust is burned to death 
A smolder of rust
From fragile hands 
Reaching for straws  
To regrow the charred grass 
But the fire restarts 
With a flash
A burst of charcoaled truth 
When I view you 
Striking a fuse, splitting vows in two  
And here I remain 
Outside your window
Getting slammed by pain 
Chunks of heart break off
Slipping down the gutters drain 
Why I seem
To never learn this lesson
Bulldozed by lies careful construction
Trust is impossible to grasp
When you’ve tied my feet
And sawed off my hands 
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Wilted 

by Souldiergirl



I smell the rose

Soft red velvet
Remembering…
When you came from behind
And slid it across my shoulderline
Its comforting scent 
Smoldering me with love evidence 
Nibbling my ear and curling me near
Gently lifting me up
And placing me down
Gaze to gaze 
A promise was made
You willed not to stray
Now the petals ripped and stained 
From a hand that carries teardrops
From eyes that witnessed your love cropped
Leaving truth outside the picture
The comforting memory 
Is now a a wilted vapor 

Mind Cage

by Souldiergirl

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Mind cage

Like snorting glue
I inhaled your every word
Sticky verbs
Clinging to the verge
Of the sweet nothings
Loaded with
Nothing
Your promises
Piecing together my hollow casket
Falling right through
To the abyss of your craziness
Taping gushing knuckles
Fighting my way out
Climbing mountains
From illusionary molehills
Never deserving of your prize
Until you needed me smiling at your side
Ring ring…
No
Not anymore
Spurred up with silver queens
I will feast on self made treats
My cage is now your pen
Barking in your stench and soil
Selling fools gold to the ignorant mind
Poor pretty things
Shackled in your circus strings
I’m moving higher
Freed from the mind cage
Leaving behind a life of chaos
and disaster

Criminal

by Souldiergirl

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Mugshots

Patterned against my white walls like

The gunshots

You patterned into my permeable soul

Behaving like such a hotshot

When I’m the one who harpooned you

With one shot

Lovers in lust couldn’t stop

Until you belittled me with

Lies and small talk

Clarity leaked out and

Pushed me on top

Packing all of our memories in a box

I used to think they were pictures

But now I see it plainly

A criminal and his mugshots

Stages

by Souldiergirl

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Mixed words Mixed looks

Mixed scenarios

I’m in your hooks

Lost pieces Lost souls

Lost lovers

I’m in your pull

Fallen clothes Fallen stars

Fallen parts

I’m in your heart

Locked lips Locked hands

Locked plans

I’m in your command

Promises made Promises teased

Promises empty

I’m in your trapeze

Lies whispered Lies screaming

Lies naked and revealing

You denied You doubted

You put me in the rearview

I’m treasured I’m honored

By an unknown future

So fuck the lies

I’m starting over

Young again

by Souldiergirl

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Foundations built on lies

The sky is blue

You convinced me it was white

Now having eyes of my own

Like a baby being born

I am happy to be young again

Two were to become one

But you chose to blend with the rest of them

And scatter me to the sea

A burned lovers ashes

Sinking down to the fishes

But I rose to the surface

With hair of babies breath

And eyes of wonderment

I am happy to be young again

Cleansed from your darkness

Redefining what beautiful is

My soul is mine again

by Souldiergirl

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Tonight my pain is as deep as the ocean

My sorrow is painted in dark alleyways

My eyes are in dreary disbelief

For my soul is mine again

You have returned it

In many pieces

All over this room

That feels like a endless field

Where I see no end and I yearn for reason

Reasons that will never be mine

They belong to you

You made your choices

And now I make mine too

But first…

I will lay in this field

Gazing at the white world

Fumbling for my heart that got away

Being the darkness, painting my pain

Throughout the alleyways.

Betrayed

by Souldiergirl

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Betrayed

In the worst kind of way

It hurts It stings

It is raw and it bleeds

I would if I could

Cauterize

but the memories claw the wounds open again

like trees hitting the window

In a storm beyond my control

Lies spring eternal

The heartbreak you administered

Is lethal

Oh Doctor Doctor

Tell me what’s the cure…

For this deadly betrayal?

I became the centerfold

For his lies and scandal

Oh Doctor Doctor

Come a little closer

Transform me into more than one can handle

Take these feelings burning my soul

The side effects of betrayals disaster

Burn them into oblivion

And return them to their master

Before my morning mug

by Souldiergirl

Before my morning mug

The annoyance of irony 

The drag of being alive today
The uncomfortable heaviness all over me 
The only comfort is being with you
But then again eventually you will leave too
The constant pang of the bitter truth
The way we can’t change the history of our roots 
The way the pain clings like a million knives 
The way they back stab and don’t bother to lie 
Sometimes I wish they would 
Just tell me that life is going to be grand 
That I was worth the sacrifice 
That I was worth not the wait
But worth it today
And today would feel great
As you slide the knives further in 
Under the guise of promises and a tailor made grin.