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Choices Made for Us 

by Souldiergirl

  Here we go

Pretty spirits arranged in rows 
Somehow we still end up alone
I would say-
wind me up like a doll
And I’ll spin round and round
Or dance in place
He should get what he paid for
But waiting isn’t what we were made for
Opposite those who die to settle
We aren’t tired
We aren’t tragic
We are alive and awake
We are sewn from magic
Rip off this dress made from velvet
Run into poverty’s hands 
I don’t want your majesty
When I could live in freedom. 

Yeah, I did 

by Souldiergirl

 The turning out 

the sparkling wood
all the things
no we never never would
the glass is empty
your coat is off
the window is jagged
on the glass lives frost
The sink is black
and I am bleeding red
wanna be an astronaut
and fly away
come untie my ribbons
As the stars salute the balcony
Ive bubbled over from this back burner
now you take the lead
the drum beats time
when you use to be right
he’s not as fun
but no doubt hes mine
and he knows what i like
the tickle in the spot
the dark curves
the madness of knots
you’re the one who let go
no we never never would
well
yeah
I did


I’ll stay black 

by Souldiergirl

The world of black 

Is all too familiar
Void of life and void of color
I longed to put my brain on autocorrect
So when I thought death
It would translate to love
The pills from all the doctors
My neck cracked in despair
Dripping all my yesterday’s
A constant strangulation of guilts face
They say it’s a process
of trial and error
Plastic bottles
milligrams increased to fire
But now I am a robot
Suited underneath their experiments
Trembling in an aftershock of side effects
My body has not succumb to this
Prick me with a needle
They say it’s progress I can’t feel it!
No…
I don’t think so
You can’t grow happy from capsules
Like the wound is gushing
And instead of digging and fusing
They add bandaid upon bandaid
When I tell them I’m still bleeding…
I find comfort in the sea urchin
Poking to keep me breathing
I’ve been under so long
I navigate the darkness so well
But they hooked me to a fancy gps
Designed to misdirect my hell
You’ve lost your mind,
And we can fix it right up!
No…
I disagree
You see, I didn’t choose this life
This life chose me
And I’d rather conquer my blackness
Then choke on a diluted dream

Track Marks 

by Souldiergirl

  

All of the noises are drowning out
But you are screaming loud
And this place we are in 
Is the sheep dressed in the devils skin
They want to see the flowers
They want to see the rose filled goblets
We are right in front of thier glasses
We are drowning in the tragic

I planted my heart that grew into a sunbeam
Underneath all the brightness 
They are still shivering in sadness
They never hear the angelic singing
They never hear the church bells beckoning
We are in an abnormal space

We are not the way we were made 

I’m learning everyday
I’m seeing the conditioned ways
They stand frozen in a microwave
They worship plastic forks and silver spoons
I reach for your hand
We kneel on our own
This life knows no reference for home

I melted away 
Maybe you’ll feel me itching your fingers
Maybe you’ll remember when you see the track marks
Their carpets become so dark they don’t see the stains
They turn their back on the reasons they came

We found eachother                      Bravery our minds                                and Jesus our mother


Nightscape 

by Souldiergirl



I’m getting lost tonight

My eyes close to the fray
Opening in a moonlit symphony 
Where magic frolics to Bach’s play
I loved so hard 
Like when the house is built 
My love protects and surrounds
You promised to paint my walls and grow truth from faults 
I loved so hard 
You chipped the colors and slammed the door
Hands grabbing shambles
I swear to love…never again! 
While wounded blisters coat the skin
Along my window-seat
I ponder how love became an enemy
Unable to latch it down 
My imagination lifts it up 
Painting the skies 
In a far off place 
To be a portrait 
of an unwilling grave 



Never let go 

by Souldiergirl



Mile upon mile 
My love piggybacks on a twisting spiral 
An essence through the atmosphere 
Scattering shades from heaven 
Angelic tunes tinted with euphoric blue
Watercoloring your morning horizon
I want you to know where I stand 
No matter the gaps of earthly space 
That climb and stretch in between 
The physical us
May you hear my voice spilling upon you
The truth is I am right there
The flower in your palm
The breeze licking your skin
I have never let go
Since the moment we began 


Souldier

by Souldiergirl



The cries of an aching world

Whimpering shrills  
Flow through the portal of my broken heart
I yearn to answer each one 
Embracing outstretched arms 
With legs stuck into cement 
As eyes drip drip drip 
And mouths scream “help!”
Daughter of Zion
Wings splay in an outburst
The temper tantrum of an angel 
As the enemy grows with pride 
Grooming his own demise 
Unable to see past himself 
To feel the soldier approaching
From behind 


Revolutionary 

by Souldiergirl



Seven steps toward the sun 

Seven inches will reach the end  
Seven seconds..
Is when I let go and run 
Too foreign is the face of the reflection 
The haunt of 
“Is this what I really want”
Screaming like an old song
Or a familiar scent
I want to be like a reed in the water
Broken from robotic commitment 
The yes and no’s of behavior 
The falsetto of mediocre 
Shatter me into the wild 
Carve me out and into a sculpture 
I will break it apart
And sprint even further 
From the table you’ve set for my future
Don’t you see?
I will never live there
Today is already the sleeping tomorrow 
And I am young in the water
What you have predestined 
Is not for me
Don’t you see?
You don’t even know who I am
I am no longer your child 
I am a revolutionary woman
Without a mother 
Without a father 


My Light 

by Souldiergirl

She sits with her back to me

On the edge of our memories
She knows I am close 
It’s the bond of our blended souls 
Her hair sweeps over her shoulder
She is the sunshine for our summer 
All the pasts of darkness 
Worked through gravestones to 
dig and bury us
Yet even in between rock and mortar 
Light will always break asunder 
And now I pause and watch her
My fairy winged angel
With a raw fleshed halo 
For generations 
We have clung together 
She saved my life 
Volunteering for the front lines 
Demanding to take the fall for us 
My sweet sweet breath of existence 
It is in you I find 
My eternal light.