Sorrows Flight

I am naked and skin

Dissolving into the cracks

That lead me back

To a tiny casket

A love turned black

I begin to lose sleep

Just like back then

An ever haunting fear

It will happen

Again

Then…I breathe

I have no control

Pretending I do

Has worn me thin

I look at my youngest

Joyful to the fullest

Her magical essence

Shifts my perspective

She transforms

The pain in our faces

For I still have

Three precious angels

Though they may be

Flying

In different spaces

Advertisements

Silly Little Rabbit

He jumps into holes when he cannot see
I suppose he is hoping he will land on both feet
Always assuming he’s playing for keeps
But assuming positions him down on his knees 
For assumption is the offspring of arrogance in heat
He hacked into the electronic pulses of me
I suppose he wanted to find a tasty treat 
Something beyond what his knowledge could read 
So he broke into my gated privacy 
But the wounds of assumption are claws on his keys 
Typing faster yet discovering nothing 
As a daughter of the Father I keep my treasures tightly guarded 
My most sacred gifts I wouldn’t share with an overzealous audience 
To assume they would value my precious secrets 
Is exactly how the rabbit got his foot in a keychain for existence 
Inside my mind is the storage of what’s true and relevant 
The artist on a trapeze that the rabbit could never catch 
Windows are just a scapegoat with open blinds 
As my poetry is just a front with pretty ryhmes 
A therapeutic session without being nickel and dimed 
But a hidden reality sways in the depths of me 
An exotic dancer under lock and key 
His assumptions are blindfolded, forbidden to see 
For my sealed lips, there is no possible entry. 


burning

I’m the most feminine beast you will ever meet
My writing is literally my heart beat
Keeps me from the land of the dead
Kinda like my dad Invented Fred 
If you know him then you know this 
The way I feel prickles on my fingertips 
Scary when a needle doesn’t do this 
So I sit on my porch at night 
And bleed through my locked lips
Therapy is soft and cuddly 
It’s so cute when the nice lady talks to me 
But a stranger she will always be 
Placing textbook and theories 
On an unnamed baby 
We all have monsters
In their pretty little cages 
Making ugly little faces 
We all need to free them
I let mine out atop the lines of these pages 

Everyday

Needs, wants

Interchangeable fonts 
quenching water bodies lack
Tattoos of our life stamped on your back
Cigarettes and feet up
Back and forth conversation 
Sex and stimulation
Giver takes what taking gives 
Selflessness 
Hand in hand
Cigarettes 
Fresh earth 
Unclenched fists 
Radiance and chaos 
Understanding and bliss 
Fantasies
Angelic rebels 
Dates without expiration 
Union Pacific 
Living in the middle of it 
Vibrations 
Wisdom and patience 
Glorious nights 
Earlier days 
Lust and love
Ice cold waves 
Steaming coffee
Summer,winter, fall
Everything and all 
Naked 
Souls
Sex
Cigarettes
Sweating 
Selflessness 
Needing 
Wanting 
Craving 
Deliciousness 
Life and death
Every second
Every breath 

Sail or Seize

Guess it wasn’t enough for you to be at that hospital bed 

For you to utter the words, “I’m not ready yet”
I guess Im special because 
I get to walk through the stinging nettles of death
So I know we don’t have much time left 
And while you’re busy straightening all those knots 
The ship is sailing away
Because life just happens that way 
Your tears will be stranded in the lonely night 
Bargaining for the chance to seize that day 

Before my morning mug

The annoyance of irony 

The drag of being alive today
The uncomfortable heaviness all over me 
The only comfort is being with you
But then again eventually you will leave too
The constant pang of the bitter truth
The way we can’t change the history of our roots 
The way the pain clings like a million knives 
The way they back stab and don’t bother to lie 
Sometimes I wish they would 
Just tell me that life is going to be grand 
That I was worth the sacrifice 
That I was worth not the wait
But worth it today
And today would feel great
As you slide the knives further in 
Under the guise of promises and a tailor made grin. 

Life

In the smallest corner 

of the smallest corner 
of the smallest corner 
of loneliness 
In the cradling arms of darkness 
Is where I see the light 
I am a mouse searching for the deadly cheese 
Only to learn there is already a growing poison within me 
I’m caught face to face with my own mortality 
The torturous wheel spins inside of me
And my lungs begin to strain 
And it hurts to breathe
I realize I may die without ever feeling the completion of a dream
I’m running out of time to live 
Grew up hearing about the fairytales of dreams coming to save 
What a cruel lie to preach 
life is very hard and life is very lonely 
life is a handful of dying moments and fading memories 
It’s a rotation of anger and sadness in the face of shock and acceptance 
We run until we can’t anymore 
the demons catch up and gloat 
I see my brother and my daughters names carved into gravestones 
And I ask the savior, where exactly do I find this elusive hope?