My Wild Angel

  

I am listening to all of our 

old jams

…thinking of you

Beastie Boys and 

Smashing Pumpkins 

Time does not fly 

…it is dangling on the edge of our bedroom window 

Watching us when we were kids 

Eddie Vedder and white tees 

And rebels just wanna have fun 

…so we did 

Now all my heart does is playback our memories 

Converse and coffee 

Hooked on the repeat

Smoke from your cigarette butts

Drawing a mirror 

around my face

Where you would always grin 

and say 

“Everything will be ok”

Even with the odds trimming the life from your face 

Honestly, without you here 

That hole in my gut, reappeared 

So be my wild angel 

And I will be your little rebel

Be my wild angel

Hold me and whisper…

Anything 

Scream our songs through the wind

Hit me with the beats like a best friend 

I love you and there is no end

Be my wild angel

Lead me into heaven

…So we can be kids again 

  

 


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211 thoughts on “My Wild Angel

  1. What a beautiful testimony for your brother, Sis. The mean thing about being blessed with such a beautiful soul is that the more joy and love someone bringes in our lives the more empty it feels when the move on. Although they never really leave, their physical absence makes it so hard. Sometimes it all comes back as if it happened just yesterday. Your brother will always keep that place in your life. I hug you strongly, Kristin. You know that you are loved πŸ’–πŸ’–πŸ’–

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Yes that is right sis, there are certain times I get so sad and so frustrated I can’t share and talk with him like we use to. He helped me through a lot and always made it better. I love you a lot Erika. You have been such a help and guide to me. I really mean it. I just adore you sis. Thank you so much for your words and love and hugs.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Kristin, I will always be there for you. “I really mean it.” You have become a close friend and I treasure your trust. I don’t take it for granted. Love you lots too, Sis! And I cannot wait to hug you soon! πŸ’–

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Be careful It may take me a while to let go :)) Oh sis, thank you! I believe you- I truly do. You mean so very much to me. Thank you for the gift of your very loving friendship. πŸŽŽπŸ’

        Liked by 1 person

  2. You know how much I have enjoyed just about everything you’ve posted to this blog since I first started following. Of everything I have read from you so far, of all the moving and stirring expressions of your soul, I think this is perhaps the most moving. You do your brother a great honor by remembering him so – and you do him an even greater honor by inviting him to move forward with you as your wild angel – just as you have done us all an honor by sharing this expression from your soul.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Oh my Raven! Wow this is so touching to me. I do know because you are so good to me and always taking the time to share and it means so much. Thank you my close friend for what you’ve said here. I miss him terribly and to hear this has moved you in such a way and how you feel i am honoring him, it helps me and it hugs my heart. thank you so much. xxx

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Love you sis I know how you feel in a way I have a brother and I miss him so much we love each other dearly but I haven’t seen him in person since the day I left Italy 13 years ago we are lucky that we can talk we have been always so close since we were kids…your beautiful and moving poem resonate to me a lot! You are a wonderful loving soul sis he is always next to you…

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Oh sis I love you so much! 13 years- that is far too long, I can imagine that would be so hard. Bless your precious heart- is it a possibility to see him again? I will put my believe and wishes up high for you. You are so precious to me. Thank you for being here sis ❀️

        Liked by 1 person

      1. You’ve helped me get through this hard time, the grief and the missing. Hope you know that. I remember when you wrote that souldiers piece for me and made me feel so loved I cried. You’re my treasure. Love you

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I felt instant love and it has only continued to grow and overflow. You are an amazing and beautiful Souldier. We will navigate these painful waters and ALWAYS make our way to the joyful seas – together!!!!!

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Me too sister-so much ❀️
        This is random but is yours an award free blog? Trying to get to some of the ones that have been left for me but didn’t want to pass on if you didn’t want. Ya know? 😘

        Liked by 1 person

  3. What a beautiful tribute to the love you have for your Brother. He is so much more to you than just a sibling. He is a treasured Ally. Every word on this page is a memorial to the capacity for immeasurable love that is contained within the Heart that beats in your Chest. Thank you for sharing this with Us, Sisterheart. All My Love.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. And again you just know me so well. I shouldn’t be surprised should I :)) love you brotherheart πŸ’™πŸ². Yes he was most definitely an ally and I have been searching for that word and I found it here- from you. That’s exactly what he was- he had my back when no one else did and I fucking miss that Eric. Thank you more than you know for this.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re welcome and that’s what big brother Syl is for πŸ˜‰ better treat you right or else πŸ€”πŸ˜‘πŸ‘Š πŸ€•….but the old fashion talkin to first πŸ™

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Haha yesss!! You’ve made my night. Yay!! Ha, yes we will give him a chance with a nice talk but that’s a one time offer from big brother Syl β˜οΈπŸ‘‰πŸšΆπŸ‘Š. β˜ΊοΈπŸ˜‰

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Kristin, this is so beautiful. An amazing tribute to Joseph. You’ve really laid your heart on the page. A feeling of love in every word.
    Such amazing Memories that will be with you always to recall and remember that feeling in your heart of pure love for him.
    Holding you tight, Love you always❀❀❀

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Oh thank you Rich. I could use a good squeeze. :)) yes im lucky that we had so many good times and that I got to be with someone who was even crazier than me. Thank you for your kindness and love. Means so much ❀️😘

      Liked by 1 person

  5. happy new year and what a way to reflect and you never cease to amaze the soul and the heart. from one heart to another you truly pump the flow of honesty and make one feel things about life that sometimes one might want to avoid. peace

    Liked by 1 person

  6. As usual, beautifully personal, and real….

    Those we miss are always with us; all you have to do is close your eyes, and, there they are….

    Your spirit is showing, milady…. it’s lovely.

    gigoid….

    Liked by 2 people

  7. This is repeated in every generation…I look back with a mixture of longing and regret but all of it is part of who I am now. We always have now, even back then, and into our future. We hold the full, spherical, whole of our history within ourselves. Nothing and no one is ever really lost…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Pam. Yes we do, it’s both painful and beautiful. I agree he isn’t lost but part of me is- atleast for now. I miss his presence on this earth, so much. His voice, his laugh.
      Thank you for being here and for your beautiful wisdom and words. I appreciate you sister. ❀️

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Kristin, my heart is breaking.. I could feel heartache and love through the entire piece. I can’t imagine the emotions that passed through you while writing it. Pieces like this are few and far between. It’s full of raw emotions… As all your pieces are. My heart is beating with yours. I know he is proud of you. ❀️❀️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi my beautiful. Thank you so much. Yeah It was harder than I thought as it kinda messed me up the next day. I miss him so much- nothing like someone who knows your ins and outs and still totally loves you- and makes you laugh, now that’s always needed in this crazy world. I love when you visit- your beautiful smile on my screen and your words that are real and come from your beautiful spirit. I so appreciate you girl! Xoxox

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Whaaat?! Charlie! You’re making me cry- I adore you so much. Thank you so much. Gah! You’re just so good to me and my heart. Can you email that link? It’s not working here for me. SP is our favorite/ was our favorite, so I really want to hear. I had them on all day at work today cuz I was missing him so. Thank you so much Charlie. You’re the best. ️Xxxx

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I am sorry too- for you and me, and the lot of us. Doing the best I can to manage when the pain comes on like a crashing wave- ouch…so with that said, yes I welcome the fuzzy hugs and embrace each one! Please accept mine in return, warm and fuzzy and loveyxxxx

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  9. I am moved to tears, SG. Dear God, I am shaking! Yesterday was the first year anniversary of my Dad’s death, and the heaviness in my Heart is unbearable. I know what you feel. I understand in spades. This poem is SO beautiful and your brother would be so darn proud of you. Your Light has become SO bright and it is my belief that through our pains our Light becomes ever stronger, IF we allow It to. Yours has. I’ve seen your struggles and I I’ve felt your pain. I have an Angel in Heaven as do you. And like you I continue to be a rebel here on earth refusing to conform to the insanity that has become the norm for too many. I LOVE YOU!!! (((HUGS))) Amy ❀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh Amy! You are such an amazing woman- you truly are. You have me in tears. Good tears. When you say he’s proud it just floors me- I have felt a lot of regret since losing my daughter and then my brother. Thinking of all I didn’t do and wanting to be enough for them so when I see them again there will be no disappointment. I know that may sound silly but it’s true. Thank you so much. You have touched me deeply. I know you have great insight and you have helped me with mine. Yes you have seen the pain of mine and you were right here helping me. You are such a gift. I pray my light will be strong-that is what I want. It’s hard when the pain is so heavy. Like with you and your dad. I am so sorry for that loss, I know it hurts and your heart is so precious and so intune that it hurts that much more. Talk about being proud, your angel daddy is beaming! My goodness Amy you are a beacon of light and love and hope and kindness. I appreciate you with ever ounce of me. Thank you sweet rose🌹. Love you. P.S: I see him smiling so big for his girl. ❀️

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Please don’t be so hard on yourself, SG. Your daughter and your brother LOVE you for who you are right now! They know you better then you know yourself so how could you ever disappoint them? They know you are doing your best and that is all anyone can ask of anyone, including yourself. I wouldn’t doubt that my Dad right now is hugging your daughter and has an arm around your brother’s shoulder saying to them how glorious our Light is and how proud he is to have more family now … Standing in until you can get to your Loved Ones again. That’s my Dad! So now we are officially family, how about that? Let us both wipe away the tears and the sadness and in their place, smile and carry HAPPY in our Hearts. My Dad I know would want that for me, as I am sure your daughter and brother would want that of you. Life is but a blink of the eye … and then we are HOME. Kick up your heels and dance, sing and know you are Loved. All is GOOD, SG. All is GOOD!!! ❀ ❀ ❀

        Liked by 2 people

      2. Oh!!! I love you so much. Amy thank you. I will save this comment forever. I will imprint these words right on my heart. You are so precious. Please call me Kristin, especially since we are family now :)) you comfort me so. Thank you so so much my irreplaceable Amy🌹🌹you shifted my perspective. I wish I could keep you in my pocket for I would pull you up when things go dark and press my face into the light you so radiate that it dries up the tears that fall in the quiet of many nights. Love you sister.

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh honey. Thank you. This makes me cry- so beautiful. And your heart is so beautiful- for it takes great strength to write that- you are such a deep and gorgeous person. Huge soul hugs to you ️sister Amy. I love that dad is now part of your petals creative team- so touching. ❀️🌹✨

      Liked by 1 person

      1. BIG (((HUGS))) to you, Love. Take care. Our conversation has been precious. I Love you!! And yes my Dad truly is with me for my photography has flourished like a well tended Rose …. blooming like crazy!!!! ❀

        Liked by 1 person

  10. I keep coming back to read this. Especially when reality is overloading me with its contrived self.
    For me my family is only my brother…I don’t connect well with anyone else. It’s beautiful how you can touch so many people with the strength of your words. Take care. ❀

    Much love
    Light

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much. I know exactly what you mean- that’s how me and my brother were. He just got me and no matter what he loved me so much and was never judgy or abrasive. That’s why I am missing him terribly. I am so glad you have this in your brother- cherish it! Xxx thank you for sharing with me :))

      Liked by 1 person

  11. There are times in our life when words are not good enough and we use the comment ‘ words fail me ‘ well they never fail you caring for others a you do – You are a beautiful person on the inside and beautiful on the outside and if l could take your sweet sorrow for your brother and put it in a box to teach others how to really care l would – All and it’s so little I can do but too share your words – will featured to our friends later Kristin and lots of hugs and xxxx go with this now and forevermore you are in my ❀️Ian X

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You mean so much to me Ian- that is an incredible precious thing to say- thank you so much. Your words never ever fail- only lift me up with a much needed caring embrace and I thank you Ian- so much β€οΈπŸ’œ

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It’s what l was born to do but only yesterday did l realise this post says it all #AceNewsServices says #Giving to #Receive is Not the Right Way but Giving from the #Heart is a Fund for #Shalyn to try to Save her Life – It’s a beginning but it will not be the end – @AceNewsServices | Ace News Services
        https://acenewsservices.wordpress.com/2016/01/26/acenewsservices-says-giving-to-receive-is-not-the-right-way-but-giving-from-the-heart-is-a-fund-for-shalyn-to-try-to-save-her-life-its-a-beginning-but-it-will-not-be-the-end-acenewsservice/

        God is with you ❀️

        Like

  12. Girl I have a wild angel too she’s been giving me a run for my money and heart. I love this! Mine takes after me and while I’m happy for that it sure tries my momma heart a lot. πŸ’•πŸ’•πŸ’•πŸ™‹πŸΌπŸ™‹πŸΌπŸ™‹πŸΌπŸ™‹πŸΌ

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Ah, memories (sweet and some not so sweet) they lay in waiting for that moment
    when unexpectedly they blurt out into our present and wow!
    A lovely look back at one of those ‘beautiful’ moments shared.
    so very pleased to meet you, Eddie

    Liked by 1 person

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