Who I AM! 

by Souldiergirl

  

I am me

Shaken and broken 

With the strength of a tree

And the body of a flower

Whose petals have fallen

In a “blow the man down”

…type of manner. 

My mind is an attic of cobweb strings 

From years of trying to be their perfect “thing”

Believing they may like me

And I would finally be enough!

If I molded so purposefully 

Into their “with restrictions” kind of love…

But you see…

And listen please 

I became a porcelain doll so elegant and clean

Yet never, no not once…

Were they proud of me!

My friends, it was still not enough

Because an acceptance without abundance 

Is no form of love 

And the lines through my face        glued and replaced 

…Oh from the many many nights the doll did break! 

…Was too ugly for many who shunned without grace 

And then…

My body like a stem

Bare, with no protection 

Felt the realist love 

As God touched me from His heavens 

In my mind, spun and confused 

In my heart, tender and bruised 

In my being, sewn from the tragedy of truth

He believes I am beautiful!

I even heard him whisper…

“Daughter, just be yourself”

Hi, I am a mess… 

I am no more and certainly no less

But I am free

From the convictions of all the “whomevers” they wanted me to be…

The doll has been shattered to the doom of the well

To release a timid me 

In all my unruly mystery

He shouted as I bowed,

“My daughter you are lovely and 

I am ever….

So proud!”

  

134 thoughts on “Who I AM! ”

      1. I know what kind of strength and courage it takes to share the things you share with us. I admire those qualities in you and your work. If you cry let them be happy tears. Have a wonderful day, SG. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Eric you are so awesome. I really really appreciate you. Do you know how awesome you are? Thank you for your words. I hope you have an exceptional start of your week. 💙

        Liked by 1 person

      3. I appreciate you saying so, SG. I really do. Have a wonderful week too, talk to you again soon!

        oh, BTW, I’m going to be writing a bloghop piece that a friend of mine asked me to do!

        With your permission, I’d like to highlight your blog in it?

        It doesn’t put you under any obligation to continue it forward. But I want people to see what I see when I read your work.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. This means to be yourself and don’t worry about others, dear. I am sure your father is indeed proud. My Dad is gone but when I look up in the skies I imagine him re-arranging the stars. That was some emotional and excellent writing!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. Yes it does- I have been working hard to really become myself- part of the journey. I love the image of our loved ones rearranging the stars for us. Thank you so much for sharing with me :))

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      Reply

  22. “I am no more and certainly no less

    But I am free

    From the convictions of all the “whomevers” they wanted me to be”…

    I really liked those verses…
    Your poem truly resonated with me ….
    Thanks for sharing!… best wishes to you, always. Aquileana ⭐

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  23. Hey!! You do need my aprroval, what about that house in suburbia and the dog and…..forgot, more, but a bunch of things, so yes cali girl you do need my approval…………you better be a strong woman, I have the feeling you are. Love ya

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. Ha! Uh oh I need your approval- but you mean it in a good way right :)) and btw- yay Charlie’s here! I love when you visit. Yes I would say I am strong although I don’t always feel it- it’s still there. Love ya too superbly awesome CP :))

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      1. Well I got my low points too, guess everybody has them, but I do have learned this about me from some long time ago, that I can not stay down if the knock me out, the next day or maybe it takes a couple more I will stand up, got no choice, it´s in the familly blood.
        Take care Cali girl

        Liked by 1 person

  28. A soul-ful example of the power and beauty of dead reckoning. The magic happens when we turn off the need for outer validation, and discover the freedom of that holy validation from the highest power… The doll has shattered, and it feels like something so much more potent has emerged. Thank you for the inspiring reflections.

    Michael

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. Oh Michael you are so wise! I appreciate so much when you share with me- thank you! Yes you are very right- uncomfortable at first but absolutely more potent and more the true self. Thank you again my friend!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  31. Beautiful artwork and hopeful words. I learn to lead with kindness, hope and love. Too much negative in our world already. Always better to be the positive voice and safe place to go.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  39. This is a marvelous description of the yielded vessel of Christ – free from condemnation, loaded with thrilling opportunity and fearing only the frown from the Elder Brother’s wonderful face. Go for it. Hoorah for poems…Doug

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
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