I’ll stay black 

The world of black 

Is all too familiar
Void of life and void of color
I longed to put my brain on autocorrect
So when I thought death
It would translate to love
The pills from all the doctors
My neck cracked in despair
Dripping all my yesterday’s
A constant strangulation of guilts face
They say it’s a process
of trial and error
Plastic bottles
milligrams increased to fire
But now I am a robot
Suited underneath their experiments
Trembling in an aftershock of side effects
My body has not succumb to this
Prick me with a needle
They say it’s progress I can’t feel it!
No…
I don’t think so
You can’t grow happy from capsules
Like the wound is gushing
And instead of digging and fusing
They add bandaid upon bandaid
When I tell them I’m still bleeding…
I find comfort in the sea urchin
Poking to keep me breathing
I’ve been under so long
I navigate the darkness so well
But they hooked me to a fancy gps
Designed to misdirect my hell
You’ve lost your mind,
And we can fix it right up!
No…
I disagree
You see, I didn’t choose this life
This life chose me
And I’d rather conquer my blackness
Then choke on a diluted dream
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14 thoughts on “I’ll stay black 

    1. Yes I know my mask too. I would literally come home from work and just sink down in the corner and just sit there for a while. That’s when I was working and just being cheerful and bubbly- and hurting so bad inside. I’m sure you understand that. Ugg :(.

      Liked by 1 person

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